The Life of Me

800 Service... Unknown Name... Private Number... People who I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO OR LISTEN TO OR LIVE ON THE SAME PLANET AS!!! Why are they the only people who ever call??? And why does the phone even bother to ring for them? Why can't there be a setting: Do not ring for___? It's especially irritating when one of the following things happens:

a) You're watching your favorite movie/TV show, and the phone rings a few times. Nobody else bothers to check it, so you get up, miss the best part of the movie/show, and for what??? Some construction workers calling you to say "Please keep your dogs inside for the next 8 centuries. We'll be working on the roads 3 states away from your home." (And you're allergic to animals of all kinds.)

b) You're excruciatingly busy (in other words, sitting on the couch, judging passersby) (or maybe you really are busy) and 800 service calls you to say something pointless.

c) You've either just walked out the door towards the car, or you've just gotten out of the car. You hear the phone ring. You scramble for the keys, probably break the lock on your house, and rip the door off of its hinges as you lunge for the telephone. "HELLO? HELLO?" "*BEEEEEEEEEEP*"

d) Some random company calls you, leaves a 7-minute message ending in: "This message will repeat." And then they repeat.

e) Someone you do or don't know calls you, and when you don't pick up, simply breathe deeply into the phone for a few minutes.

f) Your friend calls you. You get to the phone just as they hang up, redial, wait, and it goes to voice mail. (What did your friend do when you didn't pick up? Drop the phone and run?)

(Don't worry--last one) g) Someone calls you either really late at night, or really early in the morning (11:30 am) when you're still in bed. You, naturally, don't pick up, and they leave a really loud, really pointless message. 

So... Yeah... I'll stop complaining about telephones now. I mean, really, what would we do without the darn things?

-Sue Donimm