The Life of Me

I've just discovered something: Other people have feelings.

I know--whaaaaat??? I thought everyone else was just here to make my life easy and happy, and I could do and say to/about them whatever I wanted, because the world revolves around me! Mind. Blown.

I'm just kidding. I've been aware of this for a long time. However, I seem to be part of a precious few who are aware that other people have feelings, some feelings more fragile than others. Some people are good at hiding the fact that their feelings are fragile, some are not. I realize this. Why doesn't everyone?

I've experienced a lot of things that have made (or still make) me feel insecure--I'm overweight, sarcastic-but-not-always-funny, not all that smart when it comes to everyday things (like sports, pop culture, etc), and I talk a lot, making me very prone to saying stupid things. All these things have gotten me laughed at and made fun of, so I am very familiar with embarrassment. And, for those who don't know, embarrassment sucks. A lot. It's hard for people not to notice me, seeing as I'm a big, loud person, so when I do something stupid, a lot of people notice. Honestly, it's humiliating. And I'm not good with humiliation. Now, I'm pretty good at laughing it off and pretending it doesn't bother me, and oftentimes I've forgotten about it or gotten over it soon after, but sometimes it just kinda piles up, and you just gotta explode and cry and get it out.

Some people aren't so good at laughing it off, and they just react right then and there. Which may be embarrassing. So don't make fun of them for it.

What I don't get is why people think it's okay to be so thoughtless when dealing with other people. If someone has an idea that you disagree with, the fact that you disagree does not make that person an idiot. Heck, maybe it makes you an idiot. Believe it or not, you're not omniscient. Neither am I. So if you want to disagree with someone, be nice about it, please.

If someone is doing something annoying, or won't stop talking, or something like that (in other words, acting like me), don't be all snippy about it, please. No matter how confident they may seem, the smallest negative reaction could ruin their day. Trust me. I've felt this way far too many times. It is very difficult for talkative people to know when to stop talking, no matter how many times they're told to, so don't assume they're talking to annoy you, if that's what you're assuming. It's just a habit. I assume it's a bit like smoking or something.

*Little side note here: I'm not assuming everyone's like this. This post is just directed to people who are like this. So... Yeah.*

(Continuing where we left off...) Like, once we were about to start taking a test, and someone shushed the class. Someone else echoed the shush. Someone else echoed that shush. It went on for a little while, and after a very slight pause, I shushed, and the girl next to me sighed exasperatedly and snapped, "Oh my gosh, Sue, stop!" I was mortified--did I just annoy the entire class? Was I always annoying to everyone?

I try not to be snippy with people when I'm annoyed. Really, if I'm annoyed, I just try to ignore it. If I can't, I usually just say "Can you stop?" or something. If it's really getting on my nerves, and especially if I don't like the person bothering me, I may be a bit ruder, but I don't think I'm too mean usually. I mean, really, people rarely take what I say seriously, so I don't think they'd be too offended unless I got super angry, or if they were kind of sensitive.

I wish we could all spend a day in each other's shoes, just to give us all a little reality check, so we can feel other people's reactions to different situations. But that's kind of an unrealistic wish, like many of my dreams, so... I guess we'll just have to keep reminding ourselves.

-Sue Donimm